bagmilk:

*concerned white parent voice* sweetie don’t write on yourself you can get ink poisoning

(Source: heteroh, via bluewaffleez)

1nd2rd3st:

ridge:

do you ever pretend like you didn’t see something so the other person doesn’t feel embarrassed 

495,571 people whose mama taught them right

(via bluewaffleez)

goldella:

I never actually say hi to my friends, I just make creepy faces at them from a distance.

(Source: luxurae, via vvankinq)

sharingneedles:

i love birthdays they’re so motivational like if i can manage to keep myself alive for another year ill get money and cake

(via bluewaffleez)

When I cheat on my tree bf

  • me: I'm sorry babe I love u
  • bf: just go. leaf.